AM I WRONG FOR CHOOSING MY DOG OVER MY BROTHER’S WEDDING?

have two siblings, both who are older than me. There is my sister Laura (f38) and brother Roger (m42). Roger has been married twice and has two children (m8 and f6) from his second marriage. He and his second wife separated in October and the divorce was finalized in December. Their marriage ended for numerous reasons but Roger also cheated with a married woman who he works with.

Roger can never be single and always has to have someone in his life. He will go on one date and buy that person a really expensive pair of earrings, an Apple watch, etc. He’s never had children when he’s been single, however, so naturally when he got his second divorce the entire family asked him to please move slowly for the sake of the children. Despite requests, he already had a new girlfriend (and her children) over to the house on New Year’s Eve with the children over. This relationship did not last.

In the beginning of March, Roger went on a first date with Erin (f34) and she spent the night at his place-and never left. She moved in on the first date and in May they became engaged. I was very hesitant of her because she was aware of his past and still jumped into the relationship. My niece became very attached to her, to the point where she would hit my nephew if he said anything bad about her. Erin would call my nephew a “bully” when he would defend himself and show favoritism to my niece. The family begged Roger to slow down but he stated he has never been in love like this.

When Roger and Erin became engaged 2 months after dating they were originally going to be engaged for at least a year. Erin then said her entire extended family would be together across the country during Thanksgiving to spread one of her relative’s ashes, and she believed this would be the perfect time to get married. Erin is also determined to get married on a beach.

The location of the wedding is not in a common place, so flights are sparse and expensive. We’d have to be there for at least 5 days. Laura had a Covid wedding last year (in Roger’s backyard) and wants to also move out of their 1 bedroom apartment and still hasn’t taken a honeymoon. I have been saving up for a house and also have an intense job and taking that much time off around a holiday (when it’s even more expensive to travel) would limit coworkers from seeing their families. I also have 3 dogs that have never been boarded – one has seizures and the other very recently went blind.

Roger has said that Erin’s family never thought she would get married (she’s been engaged twice) so this day has to be perfect for her. He has stated he wants us there but if no one can be there then the important thing is that she is happy. Roger has been very distant and dismissive of us, despite the fact that we supported him 24/7 through his recent divorce, since Erin came around. Yet my mom wants me to go to the wedding.

AITA for refusing to go to my brother’s destination wedding and choosing my dogs, career and finances over him?